Thursday, November 3, 2011

Having Fun

So I was feeling kind of icky earlier this week.  Sore throat and achy, no fever though.  Tylenol seemed to help the best. Picked up some over the counter cold medicine and the only thing it did for me was make me sleepy so I quit taking it.  Feeling back to normal again and thank goodness because CANTON is this weekend!!  Do you realize its been two years since I've been?  That's craziness and I should never ever let it happen again.

My blessing and I are still having fun, still spending time together and still taking things slow.  Sometimes I feel like I'm holding back more than I should.  Like I'm being too cautious.  Because really, I'm still completely amazed this person is interested in me and at any given time, its possible someone with a camera is going to jump out and tell me this is all a joke.  How ridiculous am I for thinking that?  Guess its the whole lack of self-esteem/confidence issues I've had going on most of my life.  My blessing makes me feel so good and in his eyes, I'm beginning to see how pretty I am.  But still I hesitate. There's a moment when I think I'm going to let him knock down my wall I've put up but I hold back.  I had lunch with a dear friend of mine the other day and she told me to just have fun, enjoy every minute of it because I deserve it BUT she said, "I want you to be just a teeny bit guarded too."  I understand what she's saying and I'm going to continue to have fun.  I am happy.  Almost giddy actually.  And I absolutely love feeling this way.  I'm not going to take a chance of letting something this good slip away, but I do wish I could relax a little.  :)

P.S.  I will be CANTON BOUND tomorrow!!!!!!

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