Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Coming To A Close

2011 is coming to a close in just a few short days.  It has been a better year for us.  We said good-bye to an old place and closed out the final chapter of a book that started many years ago but we also started a whole new book and said hello to a special new place.  We've made new friends and learned how to do new things.  I think I have made great progress on this journey of being a single mom, still more to learn but I am enjoying the ride.  I still get aggravated when things don't move at the pace I like them to move at, like being settled in my new house, having everything hung on the walls, storage projects complete but I am finding that it only bothers ME.  Go figure!

2011 has definitely been a better year for me and my monkeys and its ending on a good happy note with lots of sunshine in the forecast for 2012!

Monday, December 12, 2011

Gold Shoes

Back in the day my Mom wore these gold shoes or slippers.  She wore them everywhere and with everything.  I say everything...she would wear nice dress shoes or heels when going to church and what not but around the house, running errands, going to baseball games...the gold shoes were on her feet.  I can remember some of the baseball players on my brother's teams saying, "Mrs. wearing those lucky shoes again?"  And she would!  She would have backups in the closet...boxes and boxes of backups of these gold slippers when a new pair was needed.  When she quit finding them in the stores, she found a catalog to order from. Eventually she couldn't find them anymore and had to settle on something else.  But we all remember Mom and her gold shoes.

A couple years ago, my sister saw some gold shoes and decided she and I needed to get a pair to honor Mom.  We searched and couldn't find the ones she had seen before and eventually found out they were only seasonal and they were TOMS.  Last Christmas Urban Eve had a kiosk out at the mall with these seasonal shoes...silver, black and yes GOLD!  We were on it...and so began our tradition of "Gold Shoe Kind of Days".  It started out that whenever we would get together with Mom's family, we would wear them for Mom to always have a part of her there with us.  In addition to our gold shoes, my sis and I always wear a piece of Mom's jewelry on those days as well.  But there are days when we just feel like its "a gold shoe kind of day" and we'll wear our gold shoes and think of Mom.  She loved those shoes and thought they were the most comfortable things in the world.  Funny how we all have those kinds of shoes or jeans or shirts and if we could, we'd have boxes and boxes of backups. 

Cheers to you Mom!!  Miss you every day!


Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Losing My Touch

Miss Toot Marie found one of her Christmas presents last night. 

A pink stick horse I have had hidden since October and she discovered it under the bed last night.  She was so excited and happy about it I couldn't get upset.  Just told her Merry Christmas!!  She giddy-upped, yahoo'd all over the house for quite a while...and decided to name her horse Pinky.  Original huh.  Decided I am losing my touch and need to work on my hiding skills some more.  Although that is/was the only present hidden under the bed.  :)

Thursday, December 1, 2011

Its December already?

Is it just me or is anyone else having trouble believing its really December 1st?  The time is just flying by at warp speed.  I feel like I just finished up Christmas shopping for last year and bam...its here again.  I'm also having trouble feeling Christmas this year. I usually have the Christmas music going by now but I'm just not feeling it.  In fact, when I hear a song on the radio, I switch stations and that is so NOT LIKE ME.  Maybe once I get the house decorated, presents wrapped and under the tree I'll get into it more.  I hope so because I really do love Christmas.  I honestly think it all goes back to the whole time flying by thing.   

Having said all that, I have been Christmas shopping and I would say I'm about halfway done, possibly more.  Doing pretty good, knocking some things off the list, kicking butt and taking names but still more to do. Bound and determined not to be doing any last minute shopping.  Want to enjoy my time off and not be rushing around like a mad woman.  :)

Hope you are having a beautiful first day of December.  

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Thanksgiving Week - My Family

Hands down, I have THE BEST family.  I'm sure there are a lot of people out there that think they have the best family and I'm sure they do, but I think mine is awesome.  Countless times they have dropped everything and been there for me, good and bad...even the ugly.  And me for them.  That's just what we do.  We are a close knit family and I love that. I can't imagine growing up and not being close to them.  That would be so sad.  It has definitely been different since Mom passed away but we adjust and keep her close to us all the time.  She and Daddy have taught us a lot about family and its importance over the years through their actions and stories of their growing up.  I can see where that importance came from and so happy they continued the tradition with us.  So yeah...I have the best family and I am so very grateful for my family.  Could not have made it through some tough times without them and I'm equally grateful they have been there for the good times to share them with me. 

Ain't nothing better than family.  

Monday, November 21, 2011

Thanksgiving Week

So much to be thankful for this year.  I've come a long way and I'm proud of what I have accomplished in the last year and a half.  Lots of changes and lots of new beginnings.  Some of them scary, some exciting and some just down right fun! 

I know I talk about my babies all the time but guys...they are the world to me.  They have saved me countless times from going into that deep dark place that I probably would have never come back from.  I love them more than anything and am so happy God blessed me with them.  I may lose my patience from time to time but I think all moms do.  And I may want just 2 minutes of quiet to myself but again, I think all moms do.  I love watching my babies learn and play together.  Christopher is an amazing big brother and Isabella is the sweetest little sister.  They both are always concerned for the other and very protective of each other.  And my sweet Jace, I know he's keeping an eye on them all the time.  

Today, and every day I am thankful for my 3 sweet blessings...they are great kids. 

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Picture Show

In no particular are some recent pics I want to share with you.

My babies keeping warm at the football game...GO WILDCATS!!

The scary goblin...

The Halloween Princess....

Me and my girl Halloween morning...

Bella doing her little sister duties of torturing her brother! 
I loved it!

Bella doing her best priss pose with her new rain boots on.

Me and my handsome boy.  Love him so much!

Me and Marilee on the steps of our cabin in Canton. 
So quiet and relaxing...

And lastly...this picture was taken the day I closed on my house. 
Its blurry but I think you can still see how excited I was!!  
Proud day for me.  :)

Thursday, November 3, 2011

Having Fun

So I was feeling kind of icky earlier this week.  Sore throat and achy, no fever though.  Tylenol seemed to help the best. Picked up some over the counter cold medicine and the only thing it did for me was make me sleepy so I quit taking it.  Feeling back to normal again and thank goodness because CANTON is this weekend!!  Do you realize its been two years since I've been?  That's craziness and I should never ever let it happen again.

My blessing and I are still having fun, still spending time together and still taking things slow.  Sometimes I feel like I'm holding back more than I should.  Like I'm being too cautious.  Because really, I'm still completely amazed this person is interested in me and at any given time, its possible someone with a camera is going to jump out and tell me this is all a joke.  How ridiculous am I for thinking that?  Guess its the whole lack of self-esteem/confidence issues I've had going on most of my life.  My blessing makes me feel so good and in his eyes, I'm beginning to see how pretty I am.  But still I hesitate. There's a moment when I think I'm going to let him knock down my wall I've put up but I hold back.  I had lunch with a dear friend of mine the other day and she told me to just have fun, enjoy every minute of it because I deserve it BUT she said, "I want you to be just a teeny bit guarded too."  I understand what she's saying and I'm going to continue to have fun.  I am happy.  Almost giddy actually.  And I absolutely love feeling this way.  I'm not going to take a chance of letting something this good slip away, but I do wish I could relax a little.  :)

P.S.  I will be CANTON BOUND tomorrow!!!!!!

Sunday, October 30, 2011

I Did It!!

Finally!!  And here it is...

Yes...that is MY foot and that is a tattoo! 
Alis Volat Propriis is Latin for "She Flies With Her Own Wings"

I love it!!  No regrets.

The original plan was to get 3 butterflies on my hip to signify my 3 children but Missy went and left the picture of the butterfly she liked at the house and the shop didn't have anything else I was crazy about so I decided to start small and get this.  Work out the butterflies for another time.  :)

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Cook-Off Time!!

We made it through another cook-off.  I think this year's cook-off was by far my favorite.  We just all seemed to have a really good time this year.  My cousins joined us this year, friends from Florida, old friends who hadn't been able to make it out there in a while were there, and my new blessing was even able to hang out with us.  Good times were had by all..

And I remembered to take a picture of our banner for proof that I am actually a cook on the team...ha!

Looks good huh...I think so!

Nothing better than family....
L-R:  Christy, Patrick, Tony, Bryan and Me

Not all of us were there when this one was taken.  I'm pretty sure Deano got a group picture of us the next day.  Once he sends us those pictures I'll share more with you. 

This last one is of me and Makenna...don't we look great with our aprons?  We were working hard. 

We placed 16th in fajitas this year which was great considering Tony had never done them before for the cook-off.  Brother-in-law Alex usually does but he ended up having to work Friday so my brothers stepped in.  We were disappointed the brisket didn't place.  When we pulled it and cut into it, oh my goodness it looked so good.  Apparently our judges didn't think so.  I was also a little disappointed Friday Night Feast didn't place.  I just knew we would.  No such luck.  Back to the drawing board for that.  Oh well, can't win them all right? 

I had a great time with everyone this weekend and as always, was glad to see it come to an end.  Momma was tired.  :)

Wednesday, October 19, 2011


My life is blessed and I am grateful for all the blessings. 

An unexpected blessing has been sent my way and it has put a smile on my face.  A smile that hasn't gone away and one that I hope stays for a while because I am loving the way I feel.  This blessing is warm, funny, smart, strong, hard-working, dedicated and good-looking.  A different type of cowboy who spins me around the dance floor in his own unique way and someone I never expected would even glance my way.  A uniqueness that I am enjoying getting to know, one day at a time, slowly and cautiously.  This blessing and I are having fun.

I am happy...and I love the way that feels.  Been a long time. 

Thank you blessing!   

Saturday, October 15, 2011

Jace Brudder

It never gets any easier.  Every year I say I'm going to be brave and be strong for you.  And every year as your birthday gets closer I start missing you more, which is odd because I don't know how its possible to miss you more than I already do.  This is probably jibberish to some but for those who have lost a child, you know the exact jibberish I am talking about. 

You are 9 years old today-wow!!  It seems like just yesterday you were placed in my arms.  I had a house full of boys and I loved it.  Your brother was so excited to have you here.  He was ready to teach you how to play toys and airplane. You were his "Jace Brudder".  I remember it well.  He adored you.  He still does and makes sure your little sister knows all about you. 

Happy Birthday my sweet baby boy.  I miss you so very much and wish daily I could have one more day to hold you close. My time with you was precious and I am thankful for that time even if it was only for a short 4 months.  I hope that one day I will see all of God's wisdom and finally understand why you had to go so soon. 

Love you forever...Mommy.

Christmas Day 2002

Thursday, October 6, 2011

Maya Angelou Wisdom

I have seen this piece about Maya Angelou several times over the years in various emails.  I love what it says and wanted to share it with you. Have a beautiful day. 

Maya Angelou was interviewed by Oprah on her 70+ birthday.  Oprah asked her what she thought of growing older. And, there on television, she said it was "exciting." Regarding body changes, she said
there were many, occurring every her breasts. They seem to be in a race to see which will reach her waist, first. The audience laughed so hard they cried. She is such a simple and honest woman, with so much wisdom in her words!

Maya Angelou said this:

"I've learned that no matter what happens, or how bad it seems today, life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow."

"I've learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he/she handles these three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights."

"I've learned that regardless of your relationship with your parents, you'll miss them when they're gone from your life."

"I've learned that making a "living" is not the same thing as "making a life."

"I've learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance."

"I've learned that you shouldn't go through life with a catcher's mitt on both hands; you need to be able to throw some things back."

"I've learned that whenever I decide something with an open heart, I usually make the right decision."

"I've learned that even when I have pains, I don't have to be one."

"I've learned that every day you should reach out and touch someone.  People love a warm hug, or just a friendly pat on the back."

"I've learned that I still have a lot to learn."

"I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel."

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Do you speak Bella?

I'm so afraid I am going to forget all the cute things Bella says and what she calls different things.  So I thought I would document them here. 

Pop-Tart = Tart Tart
Toy Story 3 = Stories
Backpack - Pat Pat
Dress = Purdy Dress
Pop & Lena = Pot Ena (almost sounds like Paulina)
Christopher Michael = Chrisfer Michael or Bubba
Vanilla Oreos = Yellow Cookies
Mini Chocolate Chip Cookies = Baby Cookies
Goldfish = Goldpish
Phone = Pone
Hair Braid = Snake (and she crosses her fingers to show you)

When we drive by the football stadium she says, "Mommy, I go Wildcats".  Or if she sees kids playing football, volleyball or basketball, she wants to play matter what sport it is.  And every single time you ask this child what she wants to eat, what she had to eat or where she wants to eat, she will undoubtedly answer, "uh...ranch n ketchup".  I swear I am going to open a restaurant and call it Ranch n Ketchup. 

And as far as the potty training goes with this girl. I hear every day from daycare how great she's doing.  Even has worn big girl panties for them.  Tells them when she needs to go.  I am amazed she does all of this for them because for me, she stinks.  I will ask her if she needs to go, she says yes, I put her on the potty, she sits forever and says I'm done.  More times than not, she doesn't go.  Put her pullup back on and bam, she goes. Ugh! 

She is so completely opposite of Christopher.  This child tests me every day.  Christopher was so quiet and shy and played so well by himself.  If I told him no, he quit.  I never had to worry about him getting into anything.  Bella...not so much.  She makes friends with everyone around her, not shy in the least.  If this child is quiet, you better run quick and find out what she is in to because she will be into something and it won't be good.  If you tell her no...she thinks it means to keep doing it.  If I count to 3, she just looks at you like "really, you think counting to 3 is going to stop me?"  I kid you not.  Sassy, head strong and a total priss every single day.  But you know what?  I wouldn't change anything about her.  She may test me every day but I am grateful to have her and she has saved me so many times.  I love that child more than my luggage.  :)

Tuesday, October 4, 2011


Yes, you read that right...the kids and I are FINALLY moved into our new home.  Ironic and a little funny we moved in on the day my first house note was made. I'm trying to see the good side of things and not the "it took me a whole month to get moved" side of things.  We were just finally able to get the help and the trailers available.  Got it done fairly quickly and with only one tee-niney incident.  Brother and company was taking a load to the house while me and the girls stayed behind to load smaller items into our cars.  We get to the house and I hear my brother calling me from the back room--voice sounds different....

Tony:  Sister...I messed up. 
Me:  what do you mean you messed up?
Tony:  I broke the wardrobe
Me:  Which one?
Tony:  The one from Bella's fell off the trailer.  I'm sorry.
Me:  Are you okay?
Tony:  Yes but it broke...but it can be fixed.
Me:  Its okay...really.  You're okay, we're all okay, that's all that matters.  Its just a wardrobe. 

And is okay.  Its just a piece of furniture that can be replaced.  Took me a long time and tragedy in my life to be able to say that and stay calm about something like that but the lesson has been learned...the hard way.  That was the only hiccup that day.   I said "that" day. 

So Sunday morning the kids, my niece, nephew and I are up.  It felt great outside so I take my coffee cup outside to sit on the patio to enjoy the peace and have my yummy Texas Pecan coffee.  I leave the door cracked open because the lock on the french doors is one I still don't understand and one that can lock you out of your house...which is exactly what happened when the kids found me outside and had to come join me.  Now normally, I'm asking if they have grown tails because they never close doors behind them.  Sunday they did.  And the door locked.  And did I mention that I had cinnamon rolls in the oven?  Panic set in.  I had taken my phone outside with me so I called Daddy first. 

Daddy:  What did you do that for?
Me:  Well I didn't, the kids did.
Daddy:  (Silence) I don't know what to do.
Me:  Can't I like pick the lock or something?  They do it on tv all the time.
Daddy:  Don't think so.  call a locksmith.  Or worse case, call 911 and tell them you have little ones, oven is on and you're worried about a fire. 

We hang up, I call my sister thinking her hubby is home.  He's not...forgot he was out of town.  She packs up to come my way (she lives close by now).  I see my neighbor out so I send Chris to see if he can help or if he has any suggestions.  Please note, I do have an extra key...but it was in my car which was locked.  I also have a garage door opener, which was in the my car that's locked.  EVERYTHING was locked!

In the meantime, Daddy calls back to check on things.  Nothing new.  Still not in.  Oven is still on.  I'm still panicked but holding my shit together because the kids are there.  Daddy decides to come our way.

Mr. Gregory (God bless my new neighbors) comes over with tools in hand to assess the situation, my sister shows up and somewhere in the there I was on the phone with my brother--yes I called everyone!  And everyone is perplexed by the situation.  Go in through a window--can't because all the windows are locked.  Break one of the panes of glass in the french door--can't because its a full window.  Daddy eventually shows up and he and Mr. Gregory go to work trying to figure out what to do.  Cindy finds a wire hanger in the truck. 

Daddy:  What are you going to do with that?
Cindy:  I don't know.
Me:  I'm gonna pick the lock or something
Daddy: you're not.  That's not going to do anything.
Cindy & Me:  Grumbled looks on our face...more like pouting. 

Daddy walks off and I tell Cindy to give me the hanger.  I'm picking the friggin' lock.  yeah...that didn't work.  They make it look so easy on tv.  Daddy decides to go ahead and turn the gas off  because the cinnamon rolls are probably burning by now and I'm thinking I should just call 911 to get some help.  By the way, Idid make a call to the locksmith who didn't answer and had no alternate number to call for emergencies.  My sister, in the meantime is fiddling with the door and the hanger and proceeds to shove the hanger in between the french doors and starts moving it around, up and down, turning it and wouldn't you know...the door pops open! 

We go up front to tell Daddy and Mr. Gregory we got the door open...with the hanger!  I think (I know) they were surprised that little hanger got us in.  The cinnamon rolls were indeed burned but thankfully not so much that the house wasn't full of smoke yet.  Daddy turned the gas back on and left.  My sister and I marveled at her talents and I'm considering this sign for the house...

"Enter if you can.  If not, wait on my sister!"

God bless her...

Friday, September 23, 2011

Happy Fall Y'all

Today is the official first day of Fall...and I say BRING IT ON!!!  So ready for the heat to hit the road.  I love this time of year...cooler weather, leaves falling, county fair, pumpkins, Halloween, Thanksgiving, etc., etc.

Happy Fall Y'all!!


Monday, September 12, 2011

Plum Tired

And evidently it shows this morning...thanks AJ. ;)

We worked and cleaned and organized and cleaned and worked some more at the new house.  Still not moved but we're getting closer. 

I think we're taking the night off...I'm tired.  And I need to do some stuff at the house I currently live in like laundry, maybe cook a meal for my kids and Lord help me...get organized for the garage sale this weekend...gosh I don't even want to think about pricing all that stuff.  Oh my!

Y'all have a good one...I'm going to get me another cup of coffee.   

Saturday, September 10, 2011

A Wedding

My BFF's son Andy was married last weekend. It was by far one of the most beautiful and romantic weddings I have ever been to.  There were candles, perfect lighting, gorgeous flowers, beautiful music and so much  more.  Andy and Lindsey were nervous but excited...there were tears but happy tears.  And there were pictures, lots and lots of pictures...that I didn't take.  Had my camera but didn't take it to the wedding. Decided my phone, lipstick, lip gloss and gum were far more important to carry in my little purse.  So no pictures were taken except the snapshots in my head.  And there are some REALLY good ones.  Good times, good times.

My BFF's daughter Cassie took this picture of Marilee (BFF) and I before the wedding.  Look at that proud momma...she was gorgeous!! 

When I arrived at the hotel Saturday my nerves were shot from all the traffic in Houston. I proclaimed then that I was definitely NOT a city girl. of course we've known this for a while but it was reaffirmed that day.  My dear friend had a cold beverage waiting for me when I made it to the bride's suite where all the girls had gathered.  Now that's a friend!  After I calmed my nerves and got some food in me, the good times started and carried on through Sunday morning when we left.  We had so much job was to keep things light, fun and as stress-free as possible.  I think I least that's what they tell me.  :)

Congrats to Andy and Lindsey!!

P.S. If I come across a picture of the bride and groom, I'll share it with you.

Friday, September 9, 2011

Here For A Good Time

I ain't here for a long time
I'm here for a good time
So bring on the sunshine
To hell with the red wine
Pour me some moonshine

King George has done it again!  Picked up his new cd this week and let me tell you, its so dang good.  No..its AWESOME!!  The man just keeps better and better. 

Should be grateful the cd player in my car is still broke because I would probably be two-stepping down the!!  Yep, I feel the need to go dancin' now...gonna have to make that happen.  The itch is pretty strong, thanks George! And thanks for the gorgeous pictures inside the cd...gosh I could just stare at them forever--yes, yes I'm drooling. Do you think Norma knows how lucky she is? 

Love ya George!!  Thanks again for making my day!

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

My House

Here it house! 

I did it all on my own. I had a little advice and guidance from my awesome Daddy and big brother but for the most part, I did it.  I took the plunge back into being a homeowner, and it feels awesome.  Ok well maybe I might also be feeling some anxiety at times thinking "holy shit what have I done?!"  but mostly awesome.  I was standing in the kitchen the other day just grinning with excitement.  We aren't moved in yet but I can't wait to get us in there and start making memories.  My babies are so excited about the house...Chris was disappointed I hadn't moved us over the weekend while they were with Jeff but things just didn't work out.  Finally got the gas turned on yesterday...still not sure why they ignored my request (don't they know who I am?) for it to be turned on last week but I'm willing to overlook that this one time.  The blinds were hung up Monday and they made the house look so different...a good different.  I've been picking up things here and there that we'll need and taking a load of stuff with me every time I go to the house.  Once we are moved and I get it all fixed up, I'll snap some pictures and share them with you.  I have lots of ideas, some that have been with me for a very long time and some Canton finds that I picked up a couple years ago that never made it to a place at the Western house because well, that whole life took a different path thing which by the way, I see as a blessing now.  And just so you know...I am traveling back to Canton this year so there is no telling what I'll come back with for the new home.  So yes, there is excitement, happiness and new beginnings in my life and I am welcoming it with open arms. 

Now...if someone could please send me PRINCE CHARMING in the form of a cowboy who will twirl me around the dance floor I will be in hog heaven! 

P.S.  George Strait would be AWESOME!!  K, thanks!     

Tuesday, August 30, 2011

You and Tequila

I am so loving this song right now.  Kenny Chesney has his moments with me, sometimes I like his music, sometimes I don't.  But this new one...LOVE IT! 

Hope you enjoy it just as much as I do...and you find yourself listening to it over and over again...;)

Here ya go!!

Friday, August 26, 2011

Purple Friday

Once an Angleton Wildcat, always an Angleton Wildcat.  Its in my blood to wear purple on Fridays, especially during football season.  Still trying to infuse that into Christopher's blood...its taken some time but he's coming around.  His Aunt Cindy is helping me this year.  He walks to the high school after school to hang out with her and help with volleyball practice if needed until I pick him up.  She told him yesterday that if he didn't have a purple shirt on today she would not let him in the gym.  Go sis!!  Isabella had no argument this morning but I did put her in a dress so she wouldn't argue with me.  And yes, I have my purple on too!  Told ya, its in my blood!  Have a great Friday!!

Thursday, August 25, 2011

Hell On Heels

I love me some Miranda Lambert...and her new hubby is one hot shot of whiskey...but I am absolutely loving this new group Miranda has put together with her girlfriends called the Pistol Annies.

Here's a link to their first release, "Hell On Heels" .  Enjoy!!  I most definitely will be purchasing this album!  Go Pistols!!

I'm hell on heels, say what you will
I done made the devil a deal
He made me pretty, he made me smart
I'm gonna break me a million hearts
I'm hell on heels, baby I'm coming for you...

Monday, August 22, 2011

1st Day of School 2011

Yep...that's my boy right there...Christopher Michael on his first day of 6th grade.  Gosh he looks so grown-up.  But not too grown-up or embarrassed to give his momma sugars before getting out of the car.  It was either that or I was going to hang out the window hollering at him.  He chose the latter.  I did have to remind him that you're never too grown-up to give your momma sugar.  A little something Miss Cindy taught him years ago when she kept him.  I'm glad it has stuck for the most part because I love getting sugars from my babies.  

Miss Isabella Marie would not take pictures this morning but I took this one just last week while she was eating her jelly beans.  When did the baby go away?  And look how long her hair is getting!  Good gracious!

  I love my kids and I hope they have an awesome school year!

Thursday, August 18, 2011

Moving Along

I can hardly believe its time for school to start up once again.  Christopher will be at AJH this year...which is the new junior high and also the school I attended high school at.  He's not at all crazy about going back to school already but he's a little pumped about going to mom's old high school.  Lots of memories at that school for me. 

Christopher and I finished up school shopping for him on Monday.  One stop shop.  I think he and I both enjoyed that.  Might have cost me a little more money but it was worth it not to have to go to several different stores and drag the boy everywhere.  He agreed.  He's definitely grown over the summer.  Turning into a young man right before my eyes.  I keep trying not to blink but the time keeps flying by.

House is moving along and everything is falling into place.  I will share a pic with you soon enough...its not mine yet.  :)   

Thursday, August 11, 2011

Anybody Home?

I know, I know...I'm a bad blogger.  But really I have a very good is still not hooked up at the house.  Believe me, I hear about this on a regular basis from my son. 

Chris:  "Mom, when are we hooking up the computer?"
Me:  "We have a computer?"
Chris:  "Don't be silly..."
Me:  "I have no idea what you are talking about son"
Chris:  "no, for real"
Me:  "I am being for real"
Chris: "You're losing it"
Me:  "I think I lost it a loooong time ago"
Chris:  "are you going to answer my question?"
Me:  "what question was that?"
Chris:  "oh my gosh!"
Me:  "what?"

And it continues until I think he's had enough...or I have and that can last for days.  Haha!

So life is moving by at a rapid pace.  The summer has just about come to an end....well summer vacation from school.  It has zipped by.  Paul Franklin's visit was entirely too short.  Miss that kid already but hoping he'll make it back down in October for the BBQ Cook-Off.

Christopher is in Austin this week visiting his Grandma Brenda, aunts, uncles and cousins.  He must be having a great time because I hardly hear from him (the little stinker).  Think I'll do to him what he did to me all those years ago when he was just a toddler and Mommy went to Canton for the very first time....ignore him and not want to have anything to do with him when he comes home.  That'll teach him!  Yea...I won't do that but I will hug him and squeeze him and pet him and call him George. AND.....kiss him all over his face!!

Miss Bella has been going through some withdrawals this week.  With Paul Franklin leaving on the 1st and her brother leaving a few days after that, she has been more clingy than usual.  She asks where they are every day...and every time she hears a noise in the house she says, "bubba?" sweet how much that girl loves her boys.  She is turning into quite the little diva and I will say that thrills me to no end.  We have fun donig hair, makeup and nails.  And independent..."no mommy, I do it".  She is a fun mess.

Me....well I'm doing good.  I've recently had some dear friends enter back into my life and they have graciously allowed me to hang out with them from time to time.  I can't tell you how much it has meant to me.  We all hung out together in high school and well some of us even before then and it seems like no time has passed...we've just picked up right where we left off and I'm loving every minute of my time with them.  They are great friends and love them all dearly. 

I'm still house hunting but there is a prospect, a very good one I might add.  Keeping my fingers crossed it all works out.  I'll let you know how it goes. 

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Best Advice: "Wear Sunscreen"

My cousin Reesa posted this on her blog Live imperfectly with great delight.  I loved it so much I wanted to share it with you.  I was curious where it came from, when I Googled it, I found that it was from a speech made in '99 to the Graduating Class of MIT...or at least that's what a couple of links told me. 

At any rate, I hope you enjoy it!

Ladies and Gentlemen of the class of 99…Wear Sunscreen

If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience, I will dispense this advice now.Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth; oh nevermind; you will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded. But trust me, in 20 years you’ll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can’t grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked.You’re not as fat as you imagine.

Don’t worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind; the kind that blindside you at 4pm on some idle Tuesday.Do one thing everyday that scares you


Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts, don’t put up with people who are reckless with yours.


Don’t waste your time on jealousy; sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes you’re behind, the race is long, and in the end, it’s only with yourself.Remember the compliments you receive, forget the insults; if you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

Keep your old love letters, throw away your old bank statements.


Don’t feel guilty if you don’t know what you want to do with your life, the most interesting people I know didn’t know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives, some of the most interesting 40 year olds know still don’t.Get plenty of calcium.

Be kind to your knees, you’ll miss them when they’re gone.Maybe you’ll marry, maybe you won’t, maybe you’ll have children, maybe you won’t, maybe you’ll divorce at 40, maybe you’ll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary, what ever you do, don’t congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself either, your choices are half chance, so are everybody else’s. Enjoy your body, use it every way you can, don’t be afraid of it, or what other people think of it, it’s the greatest instrument you’ll ever own..

Dance, even if you have nowhere to do it but in your own living room.

Read the directions, even if you don’t follow them.

Do NOT read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly.

Get to know your parents, you never know when they’ll be gone for good.

Be nice to your siblings; they are the best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.

Understand that friends come and go,but for the precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography in lifestyle because the older you get, the more you need the people you knew when you were young.

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard; live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.


Accept certain inalienable truths, prices will rise, politicians will philander, you too will get old, and when you do you’ll fantasize that when you were young prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders.Respect your elders.

Don’t expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund, maybe you have a wealthy spouse; but you never know when either one might run out. Don’t mess too much with your hair, or by the time it’s 40, it will look 85.Be careful whose advice you buy, but, be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia, dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it’s worth.

But trust me on the sunscreen…

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

I'm Still Here


Anybody there?

 I wouldn't be surprised if the answer was no because it has been quite a while since I've posted anything...and I do apologize for that.  The computer is still not hooked up at the interim house...not sure why I keep putting it off because I need/use the computer more than I thought I did.  I'd also like to tell you that we are completely settled at the interim house but we're not, or maybe I'm not?  Still piles of stuff everywhere and I have actually boxed up more stuff.  Since its the interim house, I see no need to unpack everything and too, there is some of daddy's stuff in the house we can use.  But it also makes me feel so completely disorganized.  I don't know about you but when my house is cluttered and disorganized, my brain is the same way.  Drives me crazy.  But my kids are happy!!  My washer is sometimes working, more times not.  Had a guy come out almost 4 weeks ago.  Told me he would need to order a new switch.  Apparently that switch was on backorder but he thought I didn't need to know that.  I'm guessing since he didn't pay me a visit last week, its still on backorder.  I spent all day yesterday trying to get just one load of laundry washed.  Finally succeeded about 9:00 last night.  I'm not saying I love to do laundry but it'd be nice to be able to do a load when I needed to without the hassle.  In case you haven't noticed, its HOT outside.  I love to sit outside in the evenings while the kids play but I'll be honest, I haven't really wanted to do that these last couple of weeks.  I'm a wimp when it comes to the heat.   Which makes me look forward to the beach house even more!  2 weeks and counting!!  Can't wait...and maybe, just maybe I might get a little color on me.  Not everybody tans as easily as my sister Alex Rubio.  My beloved brother-in-law gives me grief about my fair skin all the time.  I'm fine with it, but a little color this time of year would be nice.  The babies are growing and changing so much.  They spent this past weekend with their daddy.  I enjoyed my time but I missed them so much.  Was very happy to see them yesterday.  I think they both grew while they were gone the little stinkers.  Looked so big when they walked in the door.  The 4th was a good day.  Food and family...can't get any better than that.  Well unless we were poolside!  ha!  And now I am drinking coffee, listening to King George, trying desperately to wake up.  I'm too old to be single again and going out.    

Monday, June 6, 2011

In Pictures

Here a a few pictures of my babies...

Miss Bella on the porch at the interim house. We were relaxing outside with cold beverages. This was before the heat settled in. It was nice and breezy outside. Not so much anymore!

Chris and Brando at the Port's Take-a-Child Fishing Tournament.  Cruising around with the guys passing out extra bait to the kids who needed it.  This was Brando's first year to help us.  Chris is a pro now.  Loves helping out.  Would rather be fishing, but loves helping out.

I call this one "Two Peas".  Brady and Bella in between games at a softball tournament. They are hilarious together.  Gonna have to keep an eye on them in the future.  Actually, keep both eyes on them! 

And this is me and my handsome boy at his awards ceremony just last week at school. He made the A-B Honor Roll for the year and I was so stinkin' proud of him.  Isn't he handsome?  Momma has stick to beat off all the girls who want to break his heart.  ;)

Hope everyone is staying cool these days.  The heat is awful.  I for one am not looking forward to the next couple months if we're already seeing August temps in June!  Geez! 

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

New Chapter, New Beginnings

We closed on the house Friday, May 20th.  I would like to sit here and tell you it went through without any drama or hiccups but I would be lying.  And it continued even after we signed and handed over the keys to the new owners.  Jeff and I had so many problems with these buyers that it made us and our realtor not want to sell to them. I truly feel sorry for my neighbors on Western...they are getting some doozies. But as of 7:00 p.m. Monday evening, we are done.

We have finally closed the last chapter to the Jeff and Missy more edits.  Its gone to print.  And I couldn't be happier and more relieved to finally begin a new life. I don't say that as a jab to Jeff because he is just as happy as I am.  We both have wanted this moment for a long time now.  Sure we will always have the memories together and our children...but the story has ended.  Time for both of us to write a new book. 

I am looking forward to new beginnings and this new chapter in my life.  I am going to continue to believe all the bad is behind me now and that good things will come.  I am going to do my best to keep the blinders off, hold my head up and see what's in front of me rather than looking down and wondering what I could have done different about the past like I have done for long. 

As a good friend of mine said just this morning..."Let the fun begin!!!"   

Friday, April 29, 2011

Go Lady Cats!

Highlight of my day....watching our Lady Cats softball team kick a little Galveston Ball butt. 

Round 1 of play-offs - Check!

I just happen to be related to the coach....she's my sister.

I'm so proud of her and the girls. I've told her I'm planning a trip to Austin this year.  They have the talent to go all the way to State and I would love to make that trip with them to cheer them on.

Round 2 - Coming up!

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

House, Easter and A Question

The inspection went well on the house.  There were a lot of nit-picking stuff but nothing major.  For the age of the house, this was a good report.  So...Jeff did a few things to make the buyers happy and we're still moving forward to closing May 20th.  Woo Hoo!!

I was looking around the house last night thinking about what I could start packing up and decided I would start with the few things that are hanging on the walls.  The closet in the computer room would also be a good start as I rarely need anything out of there, except a bag.  And I could start packing up some things in the kitchen.  Maybe if I try to do a little each day it won't seem to hit all at once?  Yea okay, we'll see how that goes.

Our Easter weekend was great.  My nephew Paul came in from Florida for the weekend so its always good to have him here.  My niece Cori completed her RCIA classes and was initiated into our Catholic family.  So proud of her for sticking out the classes and all the requirements.  It was a long process but well worth it!  We spent Easter Sunday at my sister's house celebrating with family, food, egg hunt, confetti eggs, water slide and more good times and memories made.  I love being with family...its therapeutic for me.  Just feels good. 

So now my question to you is how do you go about doing something that you really want to do but afraid to do? Do you just swallow hard and go for it or do you just put it aside and forget about it?  You would think at 39 years of age I wouldn't be afraid of anything.  I'm experiencing things in my life I thought I never would have to again like getting back out into the dating world.  Yikes!  Its not that I'm afraid really (well maybe) but the idea just boggles my mind.  And how do you take blinders off when you've basically had them for 18+ years?  These are all things I am still trying to figure.  Part of the process is fun and exciting but the other part of it is just down right scary.  Yes I know, suck it up and be brave!  Live life to the fullest...grab it by the horns and go for it, life is too short to be afraid or scared.  I'm real good at saying that to other people but horrible at listening to my own advice. 

So I have more to learn...we knew this.

Tuesday, April 19, 2011


The inspection on the house is tomorrow and I'm a bit nervous about it. Not because I think they will find anything wrong with the house but because I'm worried our buyers will want everything little nit-picking thing fixed on the house.  Trying to stay optimistic and think all positive thoughts.  And while I'm at it, I'm throwing some prayers out...crossing my fingers and my toes.  :)

I have not started packing yet.  Waiting for this to be done and then I'll think about it.  Tomorrow will be a month out from closing so I still have some time.  It's all good.

Tomorrow is also my sweet niece Makenna's 9th birthday.  Can't believe my goddaughter is 9.  Wow...time does fly doesn't it.  We had her birthday/swimming party this past Sunday.  I got a little sun myself thank you very much.  If my sister doesn't watch out, I might catch her in the tan department (yea right!)  I know that will never happen. 

Other than that, we're trucking along.  My boy passed his TAKS reading and math. Woo Hoo!!  Science is up next.  My girl is still keeping us on her toes and getting prissier every day...and I love it!

I know this is hard to believe but I'm already wishing summer was here so we could be at the beach house.  You won't hear me say that often but I do love hanging out at the beach house...its makes the summer heat tolerable for me. :) At least for that week we're there! ha!


Thursday, April 14, 2011

A Little Bit Stronger

There are a few songs on the radio these days that I love listening to but the latest single from Sara Evans is one of faves.  I like to think its talking about me :)  And I also like to think believe that with every little step I take, I too am getting a little bit stronger. 

Below is the video link and the lyrics following...

A Little Bit Stronger

Woke up late today and I still feel the sting of the pain
But I brushed my teeth anyway
I got dressed through the mess and put a smile on my face
I got a little bit stronger

Riding in the car to work and I'm trying to ignore the hurt
So I turned on the radio, stupid song made me think of you
I listened to it for minute but I changed it
I'm getting a little bit stronger, just a little bit stronger

And I'm done hoping that we could work it out
I'm done with how it feels, spinning my wheels
Letting you drag my heart around
And, oh, I'm done thinking that you could ever change

I know my heart will never be the same
But I'm telling myself I'll be okay
Even on my weakest days
I get a little bit stronger

Doesn't happen overnight but you turn around
And a month's gone by and you realize you haven't cried
I'm not giving you a hour or a second or another minute longer
I'm busy getting stronger

And I'm done hoping that we can work it out
I'm done with how it feels, spinning my wheels
Letting you drag my heart around

And, oh, I'm done thinking, that you could ever change
I know my heart will never be the same
But I'm telling myself I'll be okay
Even on my weakest days, I get a little bit stronger
I get a little bit stronger

Getting along without you, baby
I'm better off without you, baby
How does it feel without me, baby?
I'm getting stronger without you, baby

And I'm done hoping we could work it out
I'm done with how it feels, spinning my wheels
Letting you drag my heart around
And, oh, I'm done thinking that you could ever change

I know my heart will never be the same
But I'm telling myself I'll be okay
Even on my weakest days
I get a little bit stronger

I get a little bit stronger
Just a little bit stronger
A little bit, a little bit, a little bit stronger
I get a little bit stronger

Friday, April 8, 2011


We have a contract on the house!!! 

Now let's just hope we get through the inspection without being nit-picked even more.  I really don't think that is going to happen.  These people are nit-picking every little thing.  Part of me doesn't blame them because they are buying a house but come on already! 

So yes, I'm very excited about this contract but I also think I am going to be holding my breath until May 20th.  I also need to start packing.  This will be fun (not really) and another good opportunity to go through everything.

I allowed myself to start looking at bedding.  I want something new.  Something different.  Can't decide on a specific color, just thinking and hoping something will jump out at me and I'll say "that's it!"

Other than this, that's really the only exciting thing I have to report.  Going to be a quiet weekend, which is good also.  I desperately need to start cooking more.  My poor kids.  Its been a lot of sandwiches, chicken tenders, mac n cheese, fish sticks, beefaroni and whatever else we can come up with ....with one or two really good meals in between.  I promise I am going to do better....really I am. Christopher has been asking for Chicken Spaghetti again so I think that will make an appearance here pretty quick, along with Bubble Pizza. And I am still determined to make Pioneer Woman's Sesame Noodles.  One of these days it will happen!!  ha! 

Do you have any good recipes that are kid friendly you would share with me?

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Reason, Season or Lifetime Friends

I came across this the other day and thought I would share it with you. 

Reason, Season, or Lifetime Friends

When someone is in your life for a reason, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed outwardly or inwardly. S/he has come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally, or spiritually.

S/he is there to meet a need. Then without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time, s/he will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes s/he dies. Sometimes s/he walks away. Sometimes s/he acts up or out and forces you to take a stand. What we must realize is that the need has been met.

When a person comes into your life for a season, it is because your turn has come to share, grow, or learn. S/he may bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh. S/he may teach you something you have never done. S/he usually gives you an unbelievable amount of joy.

Lifetime relationships teach you lifetime lessons. Those things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. You must accept the lesson, love the person/people anyway, and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life.

Source: Anonymous

Monday, April 4, 2011

We Have An Offer

A few actually, all from the same couple but we have been going back and forth with them since Friday.  I think now basically at a standstill, unless they come off what they are asking us to give up.  I do understand its a buyer's market now but good grief!!  There are some things I'm willing to part with and some not.  Guess its all part of the game. 

I have to admit, part of this game is exciting.  The anticipation to see how it all plays out and what the final score will be.  I feel like at this point its tied in the 5th.  Both teams fighting to win.  I'd like to see us both win.  Them with a new with a sold one! 

Another admission...for about an hour this weekend I got excited thinking about decorating a new house for me and the kids.  And then I reminded myself that nothing has happened just yet.  But for that short time, I was in planning mode for a new place.  Now that's gonna be fun!   


Saturday, April 2, 2011

Encouragement & Support

I have the best girls in the world.  Every single one of them, from my sister to nieces to cousins and girlfriends has been so supportive and encouraging.  I am so grateful to have them all in my life, especially now when I am so uncertain of myself. 

My hope is that I will wake up one day and everything will make sense to me, I won't be afraid of anything and feel like I can conquer the world again. 

Snap! didn't work. 

Click, click, click....worked for Dorothy but not me. 

Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle...I guess Samantha knows the trick to wiggling her nose the right way.

Things are still going good....and I feel like I'm still winning.  The occasional hiccup here and there but nothing major.  I'm going out more.  Ok well I know one night doesn't really qualify as "going out more" but that sounds a lot better than nothing at all, right? 

Good things are happening and I'm going to do my best to grab hold and enjoy the ride...with a little push from all those awesome girlfriends I have. 

Friday, April 1, 2011

More Wisdom

Have a great day, now get out there and own it!

You only live once!

Be brave!

Quit hiding!

Go for it! 

And then there's my today, don't wait for tomorrow or a better time. 

I think I have finally figured out why I'm so hesitant to take those steps...rejection. 

Leave it to Marty McFly to help me see my problem.   

Thursday, March 31, 2011

Hi Mom, Its me Missy

I just miss you. 

It doesn't matter what I say or how I say it, I always come back to those four words. 

I miss everything about you. Our talks on the patio, errand running, lunches, laughing so hard we cry, our sign language, thirsty-ness, shopping, your cooking, your hugs, eyes rolling, sighs...I could go on. 

I still know what it felt like to get a hug from you and when I feel myself needing it the most, I close my eyes and can feel your warmth wrapped around me. 

This day is another day on the calendar I dread. I never look forward to it.  It makes me sad.  Because today is the day I had to say good-bye to you.  Today is the day I held your hand and watched you take your last breath.

I know you are in a far better place and you are not suffering anymore from that evil cancer.  I know you are watching me, protecting me and with me all the time but I selfishly still wish I had you here instead of Heaven being the lucky one.

Some days the tears fall when I think of you but the smiles are there too.  I do some things the way you always did them but sometimes when I don't, I laugh and think you would have had a fit if you saw me doing it another way.  I still find myself thinking about calling you up to ask your opinion about something and then remembering a minute later that I can't do that.

I use phrases from you all the time with the kids.  The one I use the most is "straighten up and fly right". One day I said it to Christopher, and it must have really had that Gladys tone to it because as soon as I said it, a chill shot down my back.  For a minute I thought if I turned around, you were going to be there. How cool would that have been!

I hope you know that you are not forgotten Mom. I think of you daily, sometimes all the time and miss you even more.  You taught me so many things and I hope I am still making you proud.  I love you.

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Waiting Game

The waiting game sucks...plain and simple. 

What are they thinking? 

Are they going to make an offer or walk away? 

Did they change their mind?

Is there something else they like better?

Are they weighing the pros and cons?

As far as I'm concerned there are way more pros than make the offer already!

This waiting is killing me! 


Monday, March 28, 2011

Crossing Everything & Saying Prayers

I'm almost afraid to put this in writing but we have someone VERY interested in the house.  They are coming back for a second showing this week and a possible offer to go with it.  That's all I'm saying about that.

The next something I can't even talk about but let's just say it has put the biggest smile on my face in the last few days.  Actually that's probably a teeny lie...its put a smile on face for a while, its just bigger now.  :)

I must have done something right because positive things are starting to happen and I'm welcoming it with open arms. 

That's all I really wanted to say today.  If someone out there is sending up prayers for me, keep them going.  I am forever grateful for these small gifts and favors that are happening now.  It helps to keep those nasty demons away. 

Today I am winning!   

Sunday, March 27, 2011


I bet some of you are wondering why I referred to Christopher as "George".  This is a nickname I have called him for a while...but have found myself using it more recently.  Marie is of course Isabella's middle name and I will call her that from time to time. 

But back to George. 

When I was a kid growing up, my sister and I watched cartoons like all good kids do.  Looney Tunes was a favorite right along with the Smurfs.  There is an episode where the Abominable Snowman finds Daffy Duck dressed up as a bunny rabbit and names him George.  My sister and I have always snuggled with our kids and done this bit from the cartoon with with them. I recently found the video and showed Christopher.  He loved it and I think a little bit happy that I didn't call him George after George Strait ;).  I wouldn't do that to my child--maybe. But I will hold him and pet him and squeeze him and love him and call him George.

I hope this video brings a smile to your face likes it does mine. 

Saturday, March 26, 2011


I would be lying to everyone if I told you that in my now 12 years of motherhood, I told you I haven't had struggles with my children.  And now is no different.

This sweet bundle of prissiness is now 2...and she knows what she wants and she wants it now.  Not later, not when you can figure out what it is she wants, not after you set your stuff down or heaven forbid go to the bathroom, but right now.  She is funny.  I still have no idea why she wants a "poon" (spoon) with her muffins but I give her one because it makes her happy.  She grins at me and says "thank you mommy".  How can I refuse that?   Or when she's watching a movie and I'm finally able to sit down she screams "MOOOOOOOMMMMMMMYYYYY" and I say "WHAAAAAAAT?" and she says "I WANT YOU".  Again, how can I refuse that? or when she won't let her brother buckle her up in the carseat and then later, get her out. Or when at 9:17 at night she wants chocolate chip muffins instead of wanting to go to sleep.  I love that she runs to me in excitement every single day when I pick her up at daycare and squeezes my neck.

I absolutely  love that she goes to sleep snuggled up next to me because I know one day she won't want to do that. 

First I need to know if all 12 year old boys are the same in that they dont want to shower, put on deodorant and  brush their teeth?  Is this a universal thing or just happening in my house?  It drives me nuts that my child would rather walk around smelling funky than do any of the above things.  I am constantly having to ask him "did you put on deodorant?" "did you brush your teeth?"  When he says no I ask why and the standard answer is "i don't know."  Same with homework.  I can look through his folder, go over everything making sure he has done it and he will still come home with a mark the next day because he didn't do a sheet. The standard answer for this is "I forgot".  When I go over everything, ask about each assignment, you still forget?  But I love that he will still hug me and give me a kiss good-bye even though he is 12 and that's not the cool thing to do when his friends are around.  He will still snuggle with me at home when he gets the chance and this sweet 12 year old boy still calls me Mommy.  I smile every time I hear it because I can't help but wonder how soon Mom or Momma will replace Mommy.         

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Rodeo Houston

Marilee and I went to the rodeo Sunday to see Jason Aldean.  He was awesome!!  Loved every minute of his show.  We got there a little early so we could walk around to shop a little and of course eat. :)  We both were very good and didn't buy one thing, even though we tried on boots and perused the purses and jewely.  Nothing really struck our fancy, except the ice cold beer.  ;)   

We met up with Marilee's son Andy and his beautiful fiance Lindsey a little later..and of course we had to take pictures.

This is Andy, Marilee and Lindsey...

Me, Andy and Marilee....

Me and Marilee...

Let me just say see that top I have on right there...that rufflely one.  That one right up there in those pictures...I so had a little jacket on and Marilee so wouldn't let me wear it.  I was so self-concious about not having it on but I have to say that after walking around and seeing some of the other outfits the women were wearing, I had nothing to be ashamed about.  It felt good to step outside of my comfort zone...and I'm going to try doing it more often.

Monday, March 21, 2011

Spring Break


This Spring Break was just horrible. Started off bad, got horribly bad and then began to get better.  It did end on a good note but I sure am glad to be done with it.  For many reasons I'm not going to go into details on what made it so bad but know that me and my babies are all okay and all is right in the world again.  :)

We had two showings on the house last week. No feedback on the second but hoping its good.  So ready for this house to be sold.  I think I have mentioned that a time or two before.  Its just time!

Even though Spring Break was crappy, I am doing much better than I was a week ago.  I'm in a better place and feeling a lot better. Gonna do my darndest not to let the demons get me down again.   

Sunday, March 13, 2011


You are a tough cookie.

You need to get out more.

Quit sitting at home.

You only live once.

These are statements that recently have been said to me.  The last few days have been hard for me.  Nothing has changed, nothing has happened....I'm just down.  Actually that's a lie...I'm not down...I'm truly a mess.  I have spent most of this weekend in tears when I'm alone.  I guess it comes and goes but I wish with all my heart that it would go away....and stay gone. 

I'm missing my mom something fierce so maybe that's it?  I could really use one of her hugs right now and for her to tell me to quit being funny.  Everything always seemed better after a hug from mom.

This entire weekend I have constantly asked myself...what happened to you?  What happened to you!?!  Who is this pitiful person?  Why have you let her creep into your life?  Send her the hell away....and find Missy again. 

I'm trying but I need to try harder.

Friday, March 11, 2011

Wedding Pics

I stole borrowed these pictures from my new step-brother's FB page...look how happy daddy and Lena are!!  Doesn't that just make you smile? 

Here is a picture of Lena at the house before the wedding. So pretty!!! 

Lena with her sons Eric and Andy...

And me with my new cousin...Amye Jo.  Amye and I have been friends for years!
Two good-looking girls right there!

We were all having such a good time that we never did take a big family picture, something we all wish we had done.  Maybe one day we'll all be together again and can make that happen.  I think it would be great to have. 

The wedding was beautiful and I think everyone had a wonderful time visiting, eating and dancing.  I know I did.  My brother even twirled me around the dance floor, I got in a few steps with daddy and my daugter.  Good times indeed!

My kids will be with their dad this weekend.  I have a list of things I need and/or want to do but have no idea where to start.  A weekend that I don't really have any scheduled plans for.  I can do anything I want...just should be some things on my list.  Guess I'll figure it out soon enough. 

Have a great weekend!!  

Saturday, March 5, 2011

Belated Birthday Wishes & A Very Special Day

I need to send out additional belated birthday wishes to the bestest sister any girl could ever have.  We got to recently spend some good sister time together and I think it was much needed for both of us.  This sister of mine is always there for me through everything.  We laugh, cry and fight together, although I can't remember that last time we had a fight.  Guess we're getting wiser.  She's the best and I love her so very much!  Cheers to you sis!

Remember that very special day I mentioned in my last post?  Well its today. Today my daddy is getting married!!  And in case you were wondering I did find a very special dress for this very special day.  I'm excited and nervous at the same time.  I'm worried I will fall apart later today because even though I'm happy for daddy and Lena and I'm totally okay with them getting married, its still hard.  There's still that part of me that feels weird about it, a part that says "but what about Mom?"  I've been having a lot of "holy shit, my daddy is getting married" moments.  Moments where I can't breathe and pinch myself to see if this is all real.  But even in all those moments, I am so happy my daddy has found someone.  I'm happy he will not be alone anymore.  They have so much fun together and you can see their happiness in their faces every time they are together.  Cheers to them!!  Welcome to our crazy family Lena!!  

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Just A Little Panicked

I went shopping Monday in hopes of finding a dress for a very special wedding that is taking place in just a short two weeks--actually its less than two weeks now.  I had no luck.  I am a little bit panicked....kinda...sorta...maybe.  I mean, worst case scenario is having to wear something out of my closet, which would be boring...and not new....and not especially picked for this very special day. 

You see, my Daddy is getting married again.  He will be saying "I do" to someone other than my Mom...and I'm okay with that.  I very okay with that.  He has found happiness again after losing Mom to that ugly beast cancer.  There's a skip in his step, a sparkle in his eye and he's dancing again. 

I always hated the thought of him being home alone, especially at night.  To me, that is when grief hits you the hardest, when the loneliness really sets in and tries to take control of your life.  I understood that loneliness so much better when Jeff left.  Sure I had my kids, but at night after they had gone to was an awful time for me. 
So I'm happy for my Daddy and very excited for him.  Its a weird happy, but a good weird happy...if that even makes sense to anyone.

And so, this is why I want a new special dress...that I have not found yet.  And this is why I'm knda, sorta,  maybe just a little bit panicked.    

But I've got another day to shop...and I'm determined to find that special dress for my Daddy's very special day.

Tuesday, February 8, 2011


Eight years ago today I held you for the very last time.  I heard everything that was being said to me but still prayed for a miracle.  I began memorizing everything about you.  Your nose, your chin, your lips, the shape of your eyebrows, your sweet cheeks, your hands, everything.  I studied you like I had never studied anything before.  I didn't want to forget.  I held you so tight that day, not wanting to let go, not wanting to leave were my baby.  When I close my eyes I can see everything I memorized, I can smell you and even feel a slight breath on my skin.  Not a day goes by you are not with me in my thoughts and my heart, and every now and again I imagine you running around with your brother and your cousins being such a little boy and it warms my heart.  The tears still fall, unexpectedly sometimes, but the smiles are more frequent. You are loved and you are missed my son and I thank you for all you have taught me. 

Monday, February 7, 2011

I Don't Do Mornings

This about summed me up this morning...

Ah, who am I trying to kid...this sums me up every morning.  I really don't do them well.  Never have.  I am one of the hardest people to get up in the morning, and when I get to sleep in like this past weekend, I actually think its even worse.  When I do have to get up, most of the time I am a habitual snooze button hitter.  There are days I get up after one hit but they are few and far between.  My son has inherited this from me, although he doesn't hit snooze, he just ignores the alarm altogether.  "Can I have just 5 more minutes PLEASE".  I hear this Monday - Friday.  Poor kid. 

As for Miss Bella.  My goal is simply to get her to sleep through the night.  Amen.