Jace Brudder

It never gets any easier.  Every year I say I'm going to be brave and be strong for you.  And every year as your birthday gets closer I start missing you more, which is odd because I don't know how its possible to miss you more than I already do.  This is probably jibberish to some but for those who have lost a child, you know the exact jibberish I am talking about. 

You are 9 years old today-wow!!  It seems like just yesterday you were placed in my arms.  I had a house full of boys and I loved it.  Your brother was so excited to have you here.  He was ready to teach you how to play toys and airplane. You were his "Jace Brudder".  I remember it well.  He adored you.  He still does and makes sure your little sister knows all about you. 

Happy Birthday my sweet baby boy.  I miss you so very much and wish daily I could have one more day to hold you close. My time with you was precious and I am thankful for that time even if it was only for a short 4 months.  I hope that one day I will see all of God's wisdom and finally understand why you had to go so soon. 

Love you forever...Mommy.

Christmas Day 2002