Heartbroken

Truly heartbroken...I  never thought this day would come.  Ever.  Not to me.  I  hate that it has.  I'm still fighting it but I know I have to quit and begin to accept it.  I'm not remembering to be graceful.  The ugly bitch keeps peeking out and showing her face.  I feel helpless and lost...and having such a hard time understanding.  Can't stop crying...it hurts so bad.