New Year's Eve

Its amazing how time flies and how much things can change in a year's time.  A year ago today I was 9 months pregnant waiting for the birth of my daughter which would only be 9 days away.  I was excited, nervous and scared...but I was very happy.  When I think of my children and my husband, my heart leaps.  I love them and adore them.  I can't imagine my life without them.  I think about all the struggles we have been through in the last 7 years with losing Jace, my Mom, Jeff's grandparents.  Jace was the most difficult loss.  We were forever changed by his passing and will never again be the same people we were before he died.  I thought after that I could endure anything that came my way.  My Mom's passing was tough.  You always think your parents will live forever.  Mom was too young at 65 but I know she's in a much better place and having the time of her life with all our loved ones who have gone before us.  Jeff's grandparents passed away just a short 6 months apart from each other.  His grandmother had health problems for years now but fought them with such grace.  When she died, Jeff's grandfather died right along with her.  I'm at peace with his passing because I know he is right where he wants to be and that's by her side.  Their love for one another inspired me every time I had the pleasure of being in their company.  My life was changed for the better by having all of these wonderful people in my life.  It appears that 2010 may very well bring additional changes to my life, changes I am not looking forward to.  I pray and hope everyday that I can fix what has been dealt my way.  I don't like the hand placed before me, I hate it.  I haven't handled it well at all but I am hoping to do better.  I will continue to pray and trust the Lord will guide me to what will be the best  for me and my family and give me the strength and courage to remember my grace.